Thursday, September 24, 2009

Cash for Geezers ...


Rumor has it that the government is ready to unveil a new program similar to that of "cash for clunkers" which supposedly boosted sales for struggling, cash-strapped auto makers while removing older, gas-guzzling vehicles from our public highways. I'm sure most of you know how it worked. Certain pre-selected autos deemed "unacceptable" by the government for further use by consumers could be traded for certain new vehicles which were deemed "preferrable." In exchange for that "clunker," cash from $3,000 to $4,000 was given toward the purchase of a new, government approved automobile. The main requirement being the immediate destruction of said "clunker" by dumping a solution into it's running engine until it seized up.

Now there's more good news for the consumer ... in the interminable struggle to assure free healthcare for every living creature upon the face of the entire earth, a brand new program is ready for implementation ... "Cash for Geezers" ... that's right, "cash for geezers," eerily similar to "cash for clunkers." With this plan, any "geezer" deemed "worthless or useless" for further use may be turned over to the government in exchange for cash vouchers which must be used toward future healthcare expenses incurred by any consumer deemed preferrable. The ultimate goal of this innovative program is to rid the world of those folks who are draining the healthcare system like a busted sieve, thus easing the strain on healthcare providers and preventing it's ultimate collapse ... the only requirement being the pouring in of that "solution" ...

--sja

7 comments:

Carol said...

Where do I go to turn in Mr. Bob? (He made me post this comment!)

Great post SJA. Good to have something new on the blog. I know, I know, I'm about 5 stories behind. I've got to get busy again.

Gil in Mechanicsville said...

I am just wondering if Obama viewed Soyent Green as a child and felt it to be a viable solution for the Medicare problem. Could solve the problems with Social Security too... just saying....

Ed Robinson said...

Gil in Mechanicsville, I sort of remember that movie but I don't see how furniture could help solve the problems with Medicare and Social Security but it might help you forget them.

Gil in Mechanicsville said...

Ed, In the movie the government's solution to over population was to kill off anyone over 60 and turned them into part of the food supply...

TheSouthernJackAss said...

Carol ... you could have turned Bob in under either program ... clunker or geezer ...

BOB said...

Goodness Gil, that does sound very much like "Cash For Geezers" ... though a better plan would be to use the younger, nonproductive ones, methinks ... more of them and probably tastier too!

TheSouthernJackAss said...

It's about time for a jackal hunt ...