Thursday, April 8, 2010

Wooden Indian ...


I haven't been posting much lately, reckon I just didn't have much of anything worth posting, but for me, that might be considered as par for the course in many gentlemanly circles ... so I'll tell you an old story about one of Earl Poteet's many acquisitions ... Earl Poteet was the owner and proprietor of the General Store ... Earl was also a habitual aggregator of antiques and other cultural oddities ... his latest, a hand carved replica of Chief Sitting Bull ... Earl was really excited by the find, and proudly displayed the work of art on the front porch of his store right next to where the old men would sit and play checkers or pinochle.

The carving had sat there overlooking the checkers table for several days when Earl interrupted the game to ask Grandpa DooLittle and Uncle Virgil Hunnicutt just what they thought of the Chief ... a nearly blind Virgil Hunnicutt spoke up immediately, "don't think much of him!" ... then Grandpa DooLittle added, "me neither" ... a bit dismayed Earl asked them why not ... Uncle Virgil answered without hesitation, "well, that is the most impolite and unsociable feller I've ever met ... he's been sittin' around here watchin' us play checkers for three days now and hasn't said a single word, just sits there starin' off into space ... I've greeted him in the mornings and bid him farewell each evening without as much as a grunt ... offered to buy him a bottle of cold Royal Crown Cola ... big 16oz. ... but he didn't even blink ... there's something bad wrong with a feller like that ... I think you ought to tell him to quit hanging around here if he's going to keep on being be as discourteous and unfriendly as that ... why a feller would likely get more conversation and better manners out of a wooden indian!"



Comments encouraged --sja

14 comments:

Jessica said...

A: Jackass is my favorite word.
B: I've never met another blogger who ever used the word Brobdingnagian in a post aside from myself, never mind one who knew what it meant.
C: Lamar and Luther sound an awful lot like Drunk Alex and Jimbo. Seems I know a few idiots myself.
D: That's as high as I can count, so I'll stop there.

Didn't grow up in W. Virginia, and I have different plumin', but Mr., I think we might just be kin.
Course I was adopted by a family of wooden Indians when I was two, so maybe we are actually siamese twins .. sharin a brain an all. Probably got separated by a rabid marsupial when we were babies or something.

I'm following you back like a crow on Grandpa DooLittle.

sja said...

Thank you so much Jessica, Brobdingnagian is one of my favorite words, I do like to sneak it in a post from time to time ... I'm glad that you're following TheSouthernJackAss, and I hope to not disappoint you in the future ... I really do appreciate (in a Brobdingnagian way) your taking time to read my posts and to comment ... drop by often ...

Jude said...

Everyone needs a little humor to brighten their day so glad you are following me otherwise I wouldn't have found your blog...great weekend to ya.

sja said...

Thank you Jude, visit often!

Lion Rampant said...

WOW entertaining and educational, I'll need to visit your Blog more often thanks.

sja said...

Now that's what I like to hear Lion Rampant, glad you enjoyed the blog ... thanks for the visit!

BOB said...

A wooden nickle is worth much more than today's medal variety, that's for sure ...

In spite of his comments, knowing Uncle Virgil, I think he would agree that trading in their heads for wooden ones would be an upgrade for many folks!

Jessica sounds like a jenny to me ... maybe you really are related!

For them what is swift, Brobdingnagian is one of those words where you just know what it means, whether you do or not!

sja said...

Bob ... Uncle Virgil always knows best ... he has a Brobdingnagian intellect, and much wisdom too!

BOB said...

Some might say that Uncle Virgil was Laputian but none would question his intellect or wisdom.

For them what ain't swift, Brobdingnagian is sorta the opposite of Lilliputian ... guess, like Uncle Virgil and some others sometimes here vpsiting that I'm Laputian. Not sure about SJA but think he must be a uniqie cross breed ... definitely Brobdingnagian with some Houyhnhnmian and Laputian blood coming from somewhere.

sja said...

We best ask Jonathan Swift ...

Bossy Betty said...

I am learning a lot of new vocabulary words from your blog!

sja said...

Oh goodness ... I hear that quite a bit ... thanks for stopping by, visit often!

Barbara said...

I see different people, some are still here and some aren't, in the titles and the lines of these posts.
My Uncle in the post of Jackie Robinson, he was an avid sports fan.
My dad, the avid story teller..I wrote a blog in memory of his stories.. http://bustersdaughter.wordpress.com ...he reminds me of the wooden Indian story and then I saw Hank and heard the twang and I was right back on the floor of the chevy or ford, embarassed as heck..needless to say it was a moment.
Oh and the jackass..my brother..he bred and raised mules...and then became one..
Thanks for the memories.

sja said...

So glad you enjoyed the stories Barbara ... makes me want to keep writing them ... thank you much, and please visit often ...