Double Trouble ...

Bertram and Bernard "Butch & Barry" Sedgewick were close brothers who lived in a ramshackle house at the outskirts of town right beside of the main road ... identical twins as a matter of fact ... more notably they were inveterate, overgrown bullies, neither of which had ever been made to sip from the bracing ladle of correction ... "Double Trouble" as they were so abominably referred to ... certainly an infamously  fearsome pair  ... upon hearing their names one would suppose Butch to be the more dominant offender, being that the very mention of the name "Butch" often conjures up images associated with extremely boorish or domineering fellows, especially those found in books or on TV ... however in this case Barry was the alpha bully and chief contriver of most of the wretched duo's egregious, strong-armed rascality ... their normal, daily routine of terror was to loiter around town until some unwitting prospect crossed their path ... the odious team would then stalk their "prey" somewhat akin to lions converging on a hapless gazelle ... then gorge themselves on the unfortunate victim's sudden paralytic hysteria!

Now the Sedgewick brother's favorite quarry were none other than Lamar Beefeater and Luther DooLittle, who were both easy marks ... it seemed as though each time Lamar and Luther were required to travel into town for whatever reason they were obliged to contend with "Double Trouble" ... upon their initial meeting and introduction, the Sedgewick boys had bushwhacked Lamar and Luther as they exited the general store with a sack containing Luther's mama's grocery order ... "what's in the bag?" demanded Barry Sedgewick ... "just my mama's groceries" Luther sheepishly replied ... "dump 'er all out on the ground then run fer yer lives!" Butch sternly commanded ... "er take a whoopin'!" he added with a confident smirk ... Luther dumped his mama's groceries right there on the street then he and Lamar took Butch Sedgewick's advice and took off running like a pair of wild horses ... "Double Trouble" just stood there guffawing like ridiculous fools until Lamar and Luther were clean out of sight ... when the coast was clear Luther had to sneak back and gather up his mama's foodstuff because she was more likely to inflict severe bodily harm far worse than that of the Sedgewick brothers had he returned home without her goods ... on another occasion the boys were again waylayed by Butch and Barry as Lamar was forced to dump half a sack of sweet feed meant for the "Shakespearian Mule" onto the middle of the road "er take a whoopin'!" 

On this particular day, Lamar and Luther were once again ambushed by "Double Trouble" as they walked up the street from the feed mill carrying a large burlap sack tied at the top with a piece of nylon rope ... "what you got in that sack boy?" Butch intimidatingly enquired ... "nothing that would interest you fellers" insisted Lamar ... that response produced the desired affect as Barry Sedgewick's curiosity got the best of him "hand 'er over and run ... er take a whoopin'!" was his command ... "gladly!" announced Luther DooLittle as he surrendered the large yet suspiciously lightweight bag into the eagerly outstretched arms of Butch Sedgewick ... then Lamar and Luther took off running like rabid hyenas laughing at the tops of their lungs the whole way ... Butch and Barry just stood there staring at each other in dismay at the unusual reaction put forth by what should have been an exceedingly disappointed and terrorized Lamar and Luther ... "oh well, open er up and dump er out Butch" ordered the now impatient Barry ... Butch slowly undid the loose knot in the nylon rope and pulled the top of that sack wide open as he grasped its bottom then dumped the contents out onto the ground ... Lamar Beefeater and Luther DooLittle heard the sound of high-pitched screams from nearly a block away as they listened intently from behind Birdie Mae Poteet's rose bushes ... Butch and Barry then sped right past them as they headed on toward the river in hopes of diving in to escape the thousands of angry white-faced hornets bringing up the rear ... the brother's harrowing howls grew a bit more shrill each time one of those Vespula maculatas made contact ... from that day forth Lamar Beefeater and Luther DooLittle didn't have to concern themselves with any further onslaughts of hostility from Bertram and Bernard Sedgewick ... I reckon all those agonizing, well-placed bee stings had made them immune to it!


--sja